Parenting is by far the hardest sport there is. Yes, it’s a sport. You run after them, play 52 thing pick up night and day, invent games, have to use ‘mind over matter’ philosophy, set goals, not get discouraged, train every day, rise early, have patience, and try again and again to get it right. If that is not just like training for any other Olympic sport, I don’t know what is.
If you have ever played sports, you will also know that until you master the fundamentals, you don’t master the game or event. It’s those fundamentals that every aspiring athlete gets bored of, but that every expert knows makes all the difference.
Fundamentals of parenting are no different. Some of the moments which make the most difference in our parenting success and happiness are no more than skills practice time, and can seem pointless.
So what are the fundamentals of parenting?
1. Know how to stay calm.
2. Know how to teach children a new skill
3. Know how to effectively correct a child when he has done or is doing wrong
4. Know how to calm a child who is out of control.
5. Know what skills are essential for making a child into a happy adult
6. Know about boundaries and how to teach children about them
7. Know what your parenting vision is and how to get it
8. Know what your child is thinking and feeling
9. Know how to communicate effectively
10. Know how to keep the family united in purpose and feeling
These fundamentals are discussed in great detail in my book, Parenting: A House United, so I will not attempt to explain them all here.
Four Basic Skills for a happy life.
1. Following Instructions
2. Accepting No Answers and Criticism
3. Accepting Consequences
4. Disagreeing Appropriately
Ninety-nine percent of all discipline problems can be solved by learning these four basic skills. Most people who have failed relationships or end up in prison can’t do at least one of these things. These are essential life skills which are worth teaching and referring to often.
For the next few weeks I will share some more principles for becoming a happy successful parent. If you have any specific questions leave them in the comments below and I will attempt to address as many as I can.
Visit Nicholeen Peck’s blog at www.TeachingSelfGovernment.com
Buy her book HERE.
At the end of this series we will hold a drawing for a free copy of Parenting: A House United, so stay tuned!
Nicholeen Peck is a mother of four and previous foster parent of many troubled teens . She spends her free time helping families learn the principles of self-government, and happiness. She was featured in a one hour documentary by the BBC called The World’s Strictest Parents, writes for many magazines and blogs and teaches all over the world about calm, effective parenting.